go awaaaaayyyy

please, go away now. please don't send me poorly motivated, flittingly pseudo-philosophical emails. i'm not going to deal with you until you've dealt with yourself: you speak of fairness, well, i can't see how your current mindset and behaviour is fair upon anybody in any capacity. you are seriously deluding yourself if you really think that (repeatedly) telling yourself and others that you are happy and happy for the fortunes of others will even remotely convince anyone but you?! fool.

i cannot say anything but that your behaviour only tells me you've haven't really learnt anything (about yourself or me) at all. i don't even have to read between the lines to see that you don't understand what happened and why: learning from the past rather than ignoring it might be a start, and perhaps delve below the surface to where your defeatist attitude is the running rule more than ever. please help yourself and make shit happen, not sit there, wait, and whinge helplessly when when it doesn't! actions mean more than words, to me and most certainly for you. fuck, i really can't believe that you still haven't learnt that i am a functional communicator: i don't do small talk, especially not about other people!

i'm secretly hoping that this is all just a really bad joke but reality will unfortunately prove otherwise. so please, just get over yourself and whatever it is you're hanging onto. or, find some girl who is happy to have a sheep and puppy dog shadow. and that, my sadly foolish friend, is not anywhere remotely near me.

and you: you sleazy bastard, i can shrug off repeated inappropriately suggestive comments but you've taken it one step too far. i'm usually nonchalant about such happenings, but now you've offended my indifference! i haven't quite decided upon what kind of war to wage...